Most kids make it through the turbulent waters of adolescence. None of us make it out unscathed but most of us do make it through without permanent scars. Chances are there is nothing wrong with your child. But chances are they are actively engaged in conflict at school.
People aren’t one thing. Sometimes kids may feel that they are being left out or picked on only to find themselves being hurtful to someone else the next day and, they following day, just a bystander in someone else’s drama.
Bullying isn’t just one thing either. It’s a compilation of isolation, exclusion, shaming, gossiping, aggression, teasing, labeling and violence all designed to leave one person or group less powerful than another. The pain is real and, if left unchecked, can result in long term damage.
For those who just need a little advice on how to help their child address conflict, we recommend D.E.F.E.N.D.
Distract: If you see someone being verbally bullied, change the subject.
Empathy: If your relationship with the bully permits it, help him/her understand how the victim could potentially feel.
Funny: Use humor to distract a verbal bullying incident.
Express yourself: Tell a friend, a teacher, an administrator, a parent/guardian or even the police (if dangerously threatened) to seek help to resolve a bullying situation. If nothing works, contact SUPERB’s emergency contact phone number (386) 439-5730 so that we can take matter into our own hands.
No!!! Speak up for yourself and make sure the bully knows you are assertive and will not take his/her abuse.
Disappear: If you know a fight will occur, do not show up and if it is already occurring, do everything you can to get out of the situation. Then, express yourself so that other victims can be helped.
For an extra measure of safety, download our app.
SUPERB, the founder of ResolveBullying.org, also works in the school directly with parents, kids and educators. See the For Educators tab for more detail.